My life has gone through such a heart breaking moment. Its amazing how one small desire for a better life has caused me a very expensive experience. Gone are the days when i am not much worried about what is going to happen tomorrow. I really paid dearly for trying to be beyond what i could do.
Always be thankful with what you already have. They could be much less than what others have but they are blessings and enough for us. I dared myself to dream big. It was a wrong step for me because I am not made for it.
This experience has caused me to be closer to HIM than ever. This is the blessings of what had happened. Alhamdulillah...despite losing 17 years of good life....
An ustaz shared a valuable story:
When Prophet Daud had a toothache, he plead Allah to help him because the pain was unbearable. Allah then asked him to find a specific leaves to cure his toothache. Prophet Daud found the leaves and after putting the leaves into his mouth, the toothache subsided and finally gone. He was very thankful for Allah has helped him. Then after some years, he experienced another toothache. Without consulting Allah, he straight away went to find the same leaves that had cured his toothache the last time. However, this time around, it did not work. He was very upset and complaint to Allah about his toothache. He told Allah that he had gone to the same trees bearing the same leaves Allah described previously but this time, the leaves did not relief him from the toothache. Allah then told Prophet Daud, he did wrong. He should come to Allah first before everything else. Prophet Daud then realised his mistake and seeked Allah's forgiveness.
No matter what, we must always seek Allah first. How we overcome our problem afterwards is because Allah allows that to happen and whatever we perceive as working for us, is just a tool, a mean of His work, his grants of our wishes.
I am writing just to remind myself to NEVER forget !