I did it again..oh my!

Just now my younger brother was teaching me about something that all this while i never put much thought about...take care of your family...

Well, it is not that i never take care of my family all this while. Only i have not done things like, helping them with some possible opportunities. Once i remembered about my one and only uncle, asked me if i could help my cousin get into the university, the same place i work. I straight away told my uncle, i could not. And i supposed i have hurt him because i am not willing to help my own cousin. At that time, i really didn't know what i can do because, i really have no influence over any decision with regards to enrollment and such. I believe, even if it was my own children, if they don't do well,  i would not be able to help. If i force myself into the system, i believe, i am stopping someone else's chances when he or she is more deserving than my own. An opinion not shared even by my own husband. 

The other day, once again, i was being asked if i knew how to get a business spot during the convocation period and without much thought, i simply said that i really don't know much about that. It never crossed my mind that i was actually requested a favor. I simply answered that perhaps that can be asked through a certain department. Then i forgot all about the question until tonight.

My brother was implying that i have not been tactful enough with my answer and that i had once again hurt my uncle's feeling. Oh dear! Not again...

Now, i have to do something. And i have to plant into myself that, i am expected to do some favors from some family members and maybe even friends. I guess, this is the starting point of cronyism at small scale? No wonder people are saying that, you need some cables of some sort to enable to penetrate into a business, establishment, or the like. So now, i am like a cable to my family...already i feel the burden of responsibility. I really don't want to be involved in any such thing. i don't feel good doing it. and i don't want any complication related to this kind of involvement. oh dear...what is the best to do now? stick to my principle? i wish i don't have to think about this...help!!