Penghargaan buat Ella

Terima kasih KakChik@Ella. Sebab you la i kat sini tau..dalam dunia blogger

Dulu i tak minat..tak ambil pusing..dan tak terfikir
Dulu i cume dengar je pasalnya..tak jengok pun
Sekarang..seronok duduk dalam dunia blogger..
Banyak sebab kenapa i berasa beruntung kenal dengan Ella.
Sebab Ella la i kenal dengan Nani dan keluarganya, juga KakYon dan keluarganya.
Sebab Ella la i start jadi blogger.
Sebab Ella la i g bercuti tahun ini...long overdue cuti.
Sebab Ella la i pandai manjakan diri g spa.
Sebab Ella la jugak i pandai guna SKII...hehehe...

Banyak sebab lain kenapa kawan dengan Ella ni seronok. I memang tak ramai kawan yang rapat especially kat rumah i...i ngan Ella memang ngam!

Dan sekarang..i have best buddiz: Ella, Nani and Yanti! Soon..KakYon..ok kan KakYon?

Thank you so much Ella for everything.
May our friendship remains the BEST!

New Year...are we prepared?

The year 2011 is just about to end tonight, and new year is surreptitiously and boldly about to make its appearance midnight tonight...aaahhhh....what does that mean?

I am looking at myself. Wondering what have i been doing all this year of 2011? What have i achieved? Have i succeeded with my past resolutions? Did i have any...hmmm..thinking hard if i had made any. Funny why i should be thinking of something which is about to be considered history in just a few more hours. Should now be focussing on something new...new year...

First and foremost in my mind right now is to start filling 'that' application form...its long overdue...and i am eligible and who knows, i might be joining that group before the end of next year?

Next, plan my work schedule well in advance so as to achieve the targets...this year, i have not managed to complete the task due to many ad-hoc events but that kind of events are expected in my line of work.

Ahhh..this is the hardest...next year, i MUST write at least two papers and present my work somewhere...and i plan to present overseas...

These are all i can think of right at this moment.

What about you my friends? Yours could be even more colorful than mine i suppose...whatever they are, let us hope we are able to work better this time around. Let us prove to ourselves that we can be the person we want ourselves to be...

Wishing you SUCCESS and more FRUITFUL year to come...WELCOME 2012 and GOODBYE 2011...

Apabila sedang marah

Marah ni macam penyakit kan? ke memang penyakit? tapi yang pasti, marah memang menyakitkan.

Semalam i dah marah2 pasal parking spaces untuk ofis i dah diambil staf lain. banyak kali kena..hingga buat i terpaksa selamba je blok keter-keter sesapa yang parked kat designated parking spaces tu. Ada orang tidak menghormati hak orang lain..itu fikiran i. Ikut hati yang sakit, nak aje i biarkan keter i blok keter-keter yang ada kat designated spaces tu..tanpa meninggalkan nombor untuk dihubungi. Lama i berfikir, akhirnya..i mengikut fikiran yang kurang jahat, dan tinggalkan nombor telefon i kat cermin keter.

Sesampai di workstation i, terus karang friendly email kepada users blok bangunan tempat keter i yang tengah parked cun kat belakang keter-keter tuanpunya yang 'tak reti membaca signage designated spaces for....'. huhuhu...setakat hari ini, tak tahu la berapa orang users terbaca friendly email i tu...dalam email i tu kan, i siap pelawa sesape yang berkenaan supaya 'come and join our office if you feel you deserve the parking spaces..'. Sounds good , eh?

Paragraf kedua tu, hasil perlakuan orang sedang marah...

Kita selalu terlupa kan apabila hak kita diambil orang, samakah perasaan apabila kita mengambil hak orang lain?

Fikir2kan la sama2...peringatan buat Rozzana juga yang kadang2 hilang cool and melenting..aduhhh...

Alamak!

hehehe..apa la i ni...nak try bukak page follower n nak try follow blog dia..tersilap tekan...i jadi follower blog i sendiri..tak senonoh betul la...cam ne nak undo ye? Ini la padahnya bila bukan network savvy ni...

Tolongggg...

Oh ye! Nak citer pasal malam tadi yang kelakar giler...

Malam tadi kononnya nak buat surprise besday celebration untuk best friend, Nani. Plan memang baik...everything should have run smoothly and the surprise should have been worked well. Tapi...miscommunication punya pasal...ada la sikit slack...tak tau la kalau Kakchik@Ella akan citer apa2 pasal ni.

It was fun though and i think Nani was very happy for what we had done. She seemed jubilant last night.

I think our relationship and friendship are getting even closer...which is for the best...Ella, Yanti, Nani and me...hopefully best buddies forever!

Aduhhh...akibat terlalu dengar arahan!

Hehehe..bukan apa...saja je i nak citer sesuatu yang telah berlaku baru2 baru ini pada i.

Last weekend, Sabtu, 24 Disember 2011, hari persandingan anak Nani Rostam, alaaa..blogger famous tu...mesti you all kenal kan. She is one of my closest friend. Kawan baru i yang jadi close. Kenal dia pun melalui KakChik@Ella. Okay, what happened on that day?

Hari tu hujan. So sesampai i kat kawasan rumah Nani, guards arahkan i park kereta i kat atas padang dekat rumah Nani. I minta la nak park kat atas jalan raya je disebabkan masih banyak kekosongan dan i pulak datang paling awal. Huby i pulak tengah panggang kambing golek kat rumah Nani. Sebaik aje i masuk kawasan padang, i dah terfikir, tanah lembik, pasti kereta i susah nak keluar ni...True enough! Sebaik i park, i dah terasa tak sedap hati. Huby pun datang dekat kereta bila dia perasan i parked kereta kat atas padang. Dia try maneuver kereta keluar tetapi aduhhhh...malang sekali. Tayar sangkut dalam lumpur. Makin minyak ditekan, makin hebat tayar tenggelam. Alahai...

Terpaksa la keluarkan kuih2 yang Ella pesan dalam hujan...hilanglah cun sekejap dek hujan...hehehehe...

Sepanjang i berada dalam majlis, kepala dok berfikir,' cam ne nak kuarkan keter ni?'

Malam sebelum majlis nikah, i pergi ke rumah Nani bersama Ella dan berkenalan dengan Kak Yun, kawan blogger Ella...seronok jumpa kawan-kawan Ella. Dan pada majlis langsung, berkenalan pula dengan suami Kak Yun, Abang Salleh, anak dan menantu dia.

So, selepas huby selesai tugas dia, kami bincang cara nak keluarkan kereta. I dengan tak malunya terus je tanya Kak Yun jika dia atau suami tahu mana2 individu yang ada tow truck. Tetiba, seorang hamba Allah, jiran Nani, menawarkan khidmat membantu. Dia kata dia ada tali, ada 4WD. Boleh tolong tarik...Ya Allah...betapa murahnya rezeki..

So akhirnya, kereta i dapat dikeluarkan dari lumpur dengan bantuan En. Ismail, jiran Nani yang baik hati. Terima kasih banyak En. Ismail. Tak sempat i nak berkenalan dengan wife dia. Mudah2an Allah beri ganjaran baik buat En. Ismail sekeluarga. Membantu tanpa mengenali siapa i dan huby i..

Apa yang menarik, Abg Salleh..turut membantu bersama dengan menantu dia..alahai lupa pulak nama..(maaf ye..) dan Abg Salleh siap dapat penangan percikan lumpur di baju dan seluar dia. Kesian Abg Salleh...hehehehe..anyway Kak Yun and Abg Salleh, thank you so much. Its a real pleasure knowing you both!

Begitulah kisah apabila membelakangi gerak hati dan ikut arahan! So kira-kiranya...gerak hati tu biasanya betul..kan3x?

Malam Minggu Yang ROCK!

Yay!!! Ni nak citer pasal konsert rock BEST yang i p tengok tahun ini...Konsert Fenomena Search 2011. Selama ini i memang teringin sangat nak ke konsert Search, alangkah bertuahnya i, kali ini konsert buat indoor so dapat lah i pergi...

Apa yang seronoknya?

Yang seronoknya sebab....i memang peminat kumpulan Search. I minat lagu2 Search...i minat suara Amy Search. Dan lagu kumpulan ini adalah lagu rock pertama adik i kenalkan kepada i tentang muzik rock. Mula2 dengar memang perit telinga...tapi lepas tu i fell deeply in love! Best!! Pada masa sama adik i kenalkan i dengan Scorpions, Whitesnake, The Queens...

Ramai betul yang hadir ke konsert. Semua orang rata2nya ikut Amy menyanyi. Amy was amazing that night. Walaupun umur dia dah 50an rasanya, tapi stamina dia...aduhhh..dan suara dia...boleh bertahan selama konsert berjalan.

I pernah tengok konsert Awie n Wings kat Istana Budaya...tak ingat apa nama konsert tu, bagus juga...suara Awie was good tapi dia nyanyi dengan kawan2...still i rasa, Amy is the BEST!

By the way, i ke konsert dengan hubby, Ella@K.Chik, Aiman n Aishah (adik KC). Kul 2.30 pagi baru sampai ke rumah...

Pengalaman adalah guru terbaik kita

I rasa hepi sekarang sebab, aras konfiden i sudah meningkat. Dari seorang yang pendiam, hanya memerhati, mendengar dan menerima..i dah jadi seorang yang agak vokal. Alhamdulillah...i jadi lebih konfiden setelah i menamatkan pengajian i di peringkat tinggi. Mungkin rasa konfiden ini datang kerana bukan mudah melalui pengalaman belajar sehingga ke tahap yang i dah berjaya capai. Mungkin kerana pengalaman semasa belajar itu, yang mana i harus lakukan semua sendiri mengikut carta masa i ... nak habis cepat kena disiplin, kena pandai menterjemah hasil kerja orang lain, kena pandai bertanya dan berbincang, kena buat itu, buat ini..memang..semua ini memberi i pengalaman yang cukup berharga...

Dan memang la pengalaman itu guru kepada semua jenis pelajaran...wisdom comes with experience.

Rajin2 la kita semua menimba pengalaman ye kawan2...

Selamat berhujung minggu...!

Now...every1 can FLY!

huhuhu...sounds good eh that tagline? indeed it is...and the tagline really sells...


Well, we can salute Tony Fernandez and his team for their perseverance in facing all the tribulations of the business world and still emerge as a strong low-cost airline. I read their reviews in conjunction with their 10th anniversary...beautiful report. A story of success along the way. It really is an evidence that if we dare to dream high, we work hard to achieve it, we can realise the dream. hey! that is not easy...perseverance, good team work...believe in oneself and the team! I tell you, this is a feat many dreamt of but very few capable to reach. Caya la Tony!!


But, after three recent experiences of boarding Air Asia, i feel, i need to write about some weaknesses that seems so much less taken care of. I see the concept behind the operation but...it still fails in some aspects.


Firstly: since they are providing services to millions (their claim!), the operating space is such a sorry state (a feud between Tony's and MAS). So many people at any one time (but of course! Everyone can fly!!!). The view is like you are in a bus terminal. I think that is fine. But...they really don't have systematic way of doing it. There are some counters for check in but...many times, only few open. Imagine, even when you arrived 1 hour before boarding or check in time, you cannot reach the counter before the check in time closes. Why? So many people...and a long queue. Even when you had done online check in, when you are late, you still cannot get the boarding pass using the self-check in kiosk. So friends, please print your own boarding pass at home. But the drop in baggage counter? You still have to queue, and i tell you, it is not a fast service!


Secondly: to board the plane is quite a distance and so you have to walk. It is good...exercise...but...think about the elderly, women who are pregnant, families with kids...okay, so the safety measures are basically taken care of...the flight attendance or airport personnel guides you all the way. Still, i feel sorry to especially the elderly. Few actually walking with assistance of the stick! Cannot the airport personnel make it easier for them? Perhaps provide a short distance vehicle? Or allowing these people to board first? And when it rains....


Thirdly: in the process of allowing passengers to aboard, it is announced that those with 'hot seat' tickets are allowed to board first...its like those who travel business class in other conventional flights. But...people don't follow this instruction. So, it does not matter, anyone can be first even when you pay a little bit more than the rest. I wish, at least the the elderly is called out first. Hmmm..too bad eh? But, seats are numbered so there is no occurrence of people fight for good seating place. I think the first time i did try Air Asia, back in 2008, there was no seat number making me feel like i was actually taking the bus.

Foodwise: of course! you have to buy. Since i was seated in the 'hot seat' area, i was served food but...same food all the times. 3 times...same food. Aduhhh...

Oh yes...lastly: many occurences of delayed flight. That's pretty normal especially when weather is bad. BUT....they don't apologise! and we can be kept waiting questioning, queueing, when we can see that the informative screen keeps blinking flight so and so is now boarding time...And Asian are known to be having manners!

Well... Air Asia makes money, business is fluorishing so well. They can afford to sponsor EPL team and F1 if i am not mistaken... Should we feel proud of them? We should...they are Asian, they are Malaysian...and Malaysia Boleh...kan?

At the end, we get what we pay, right?

Fly everyone fly....and don't forget the continous offers and good deals which appear in the websites in such a short period! And don't forget the hidden cost as well...Happy Flying!!

Someone Like You

Have you listened to Adele's song? She has great voice. And this song in particular, caught my ears as of many other songs. Why do i like this song? Well it has lyrics that are realistic. It says about a relationship that did not reached its pinnacle. People can be in love but while in love, the other half may find another who probably is much better, provide better happiness, giving more than what we can offer and has offered, thus, he or she choose that person who comes later but gives more meaning.


This may happen even in marriage. We may have been married for long but one day, our other half suddenly fell in love with someone else. Of course that will hurt especially when we are very much in love with our partner, being true to our love, loyal and very caring. But i feel that sometimes, things just happened right?


So Adele's song that says:

Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead...

is very true.

What's the point i am driving at now?

The point is that, we have to be prepared for any consequences....we have to be brave...when unimagined things happen...be patience for God probably has a better design for us...God never tries one who is weak...

But i do appreciate, it is not easy to replace one whom you have loved all your life and yes, it hurts a million times when the person we love is the only one we hope to be with until the end of our life and thus....it is not easy to find...Someone Like You!

Ustazah Pilihan...eeeii...

Aduhai..bukan i jeles kat pemenang program TV9 tu. I tak de rasa jeles langsung. Cuma i fikir, tak patut ada program macam tu untuk perempuan. I suka program Imam Muda, macam sesuai..tapi Ustazah Pilihan ni..macam sama pulak dengan program Ratu Cantik ...walaupun asas pemilihan bukan cantik tetapi lebih kepada unsur keIslaman kononnya. Apalah makna menunjuk kepada orang ramai seluruh negara kita ni pandai membaca Quran, dan kebolehan lain, boleh buat sama macam yang lelaki buat?  Menunjukkan rupa, kebaikan, kebolehan bercirikan Islam...entah..i tak setuju. Bagi i, tak perlu nak dicari bakat seperti itu sebagaimana program realiti lain. Konsepnya macam tak kena dengan Islam dan perempuan. Seperti tak sesuai...Tapi, nak komen banyak pun i sendiri tak pernah nak tengok program itu, sebab i tak setuju...Tapi orang lain mungkin setuju kan? Well...once again...Rozzana always stay within her own world...outdated perhaps?

Alangkah seronok menjadi burung

Itulah yang pernah i beritau seorang sahabat...i merasa alangkah seronoknya menjadi seekor burung. Bebas terbang ke sana sini. Mengikut lumrah alam sahaja. Keseluruhan hidup hanya tertumpu pada Maha Pencipta dan melakukan apa yang telah diprogramkan untuknya.

Burung...menghiasi alam semula jadi. Memberi keceriaan waktu pagi dan petang. Tiada kerisauan melainkan untuk mencari rezeki yang sudah pasti halal untuknya.

Burung...bebas hinggap di mana sahaja. Tiada larangan dan halangan. Menurut apa yang telah tertulis dalam sejarah hidupnya.

Tapi mungkin ini hanya di fikiran i sahaja kannn...mungkinkah burung ingin menjadi manusia??

Dia buah hatiku

Nur Kamalia Amni, lahir pada 24 Oktober 2005, minggu kedua Ramadhan pada tahun itu. The only child delivered during the fasting month. Dia anak yang hampir i gugurkan sebab masa tu i tidak bercadang untuk pregnant lagi dan tak mahu anak lagi. Masa tu, i sedang bertungkus lumus ingin menghabiskan semua kerja-kerja penyelidikan i. Masa tu, i tak mahu ada gangguan yang akan melewatkan masa i untuk tamat belajar on time. Bila i bagitau husband yang i mungkin sedang pregnant, dia tak percaya. Almaklum...hehehehe...hati2 la katakan...tapi once again, accident happened...

So bila pregnancy i confirmed di klinik, i dengan selamba bagi tau doktor yang i tak nak baby tu. Sebelum tu i dah beritau husband yang i tak sanggup nak pregnant lagi. Husband i pada mulanya memang terkejut dengan permintaan i tu, tapi akur bila i bagi alasan i tak larat sebab i nak habiskan jugak studi i. So, bila i maklumkan pada doktor tentang keputusan i tu, husband i tak kata apa2.

Allah Maha Besar dan Maha Mengetahui...atas nasihat doktor, i tak jadi gugurkan Kamalia yang pada masa itu hanyalah sebesar biji kacang tanah saiznya. Alasan doktor tu, i muda lagi...i tak ada masalah semasa pregnant, i tak ada masalah melahirkan dan yang utama, kata doktor tu, 'manalah tau puan, anak puan yang inilah yang paling membuat puan bahagia nanti, yang paling pandai...paling baik...'. Mendengar ayat terakhir doktor itu la, i akhirnya menerima hakikat yang i kena mengalami pregnancy untuk kali ke 7.

Dan Alhamdulillah...Kamalia memang beri i pengalaman mengandung dan melahirkan yang berbeza. Tak mahu keluar walaupun i dah berada di labour room lebih 5 jam. Semua kerana..technical error. Water bag tak pecah. Round neck cord la... Masa pregnant pulak, dia dalam keadaan placenta previa. Memang cubaan betul....tapi inilah dia Nur Kamalia Amni...the apple of my eyes...The one that bends all my thumbs! 

Wife and Girlfriend

 Sharing with you friends what i received from my international friend:

Wife and Girlfriend


Wife is like a TV,
Girlfriend is like a MOBILE.
At home u watch TV,
But when u go out u take ur MOBILE.

No money, u sell the TV,
Got money u change ur MOBILE.

Sometimes u enjoy TV,
But most of the time u play with ur MOBILE.

TV is free for life,
But for the MOBILE, if you don't pay, the services will be terminated.

TV is big, bulky and most of the time old,
But the MOBILE is cute, slim, curvy and very portable.

Operational costs for TV is often acceptable,
But for the MOBILE it is often high and demanding.

TV has a remote,
MOBILE doesn't.

Most importantly, MOBILE is a two-way communication (u talk and listen),
But with the TV you MUST only listen (whether you want to or not).

Last but not least ..
TVs don't have viruses,
But MOBILEs often do!

Hahaha...i really like this. So guys! Who is preferable to you? My girlfriends, what do you think of this?

A sojourn of learning...

Today, in this entry, i would like to share my experience handling the course i am teaching. I am teaching a course that many of my students or rather most students find it to be the toughest and dub it as a 'killer course'.

And because of that, i try various ways, to make my class enjoyable, with good learning experience and full of knowledge. Wisdom can be earned with experience but really, i give my all so as to make the 'killer course' becomes less harsh in its reality. I don't want my students to feel bored. So, a lot of humors, stories of life experiences and anecdotes must be continuously thought of. Alhamdulillah, many times i see happy, satisfied faces leaving my class. Only thing is, they are all scared of the examniation. But of course! Who wouldn't? Even aspiring doctors have to work very hard just to pass this course. A lot of memorizing, understanding and a lot of structures and mechanisms need to be learnt.

And today, is my last day of class with two groups of students. I must say, i am so happy. That means, i will have a day free of classes which i am going to use fully to mark about 300 students' assignment already stacked neatly on my table. Wonder when will i be able to finish marking them all. But I told my students, if they want their assignment back, please collect from me and make me correct in front of them. huhuhu...few of them have actually took up my suggestion and they received immediate comment. Still i wonder if i have made the right decision.

But am happy when the students are happy. BUT...that does not mean i can be bowed to acceptance. No students can manipulate me. Whatever marks they get, is because they deserve to get them, high or low. And i teach them to be honest as well. Honest to themselves. My class tests are done online. I don't monitor the time. I give them ample time to prepare and ample time for them to finish the test. Am i doing this right? Am not sure...but i pray that my sincerety in my work will be paid off everytime, when students graduate after a sojourn of learning.

rindu...betul ke...?

Betul ke bila hati kita selalu berdebar menandakan ada orang ingat kita? rindu kita? 
Betul ke, bila kita teringat seseorang, orang itu juga akan turut merasa?
Betul ke, utk hilangkan rindu, pakaian terpakai seseorang yang tidak berbasuh boleh hilangkan rindu?


Tapi...rindu tu apa?


Perasaan kasih dan keinginan untuk bersama? 
Perasaan memerlukan?
Perasaan yang gambarkan kasih sayang?


Rindu iu menyakitkan? 


Pelikkan rindu tu?

Berkawan biar seribu

I suka dengan kata2 itu. Kerana itu lah i berada dalam laman sosial sesawang. Nak berkawan..

Tapi tu la..masa awal2 je i beriye-iye kat laman sosial tu. Sekarang dah malas la pulak. Macam manapun, kawan2 yang i kenal kat situ, ok la...memang ada yang jadi kawan rapat i. Sama2 kongsi pengalaman hidup.

Bagi i, berkawan ni tidak harus hanya pada satu kelompok tertentu sahaja. Berkawan lah dengan sesiapa saja, yang penting kita berniat jujur berkawan. Berkawan dengan apa bangsa sekalipun supaya luas pengetahuan kita. Kadang saya dapati, bila kita peruntukan persahabatan hanya pada bangsa kita sendiri, kita tidak kembangkan pengetahuan kita. Belajar menerima pandangan berbeza dari berbagai ragam manusia...tentunya akan mengkayakan pengetahuan kita.

I berkawan dengan beberapa kawan dari bangsa lain. Sambil i berkawan, kami bertukar2 pendapat dan bila i dapati ada kekeliruan tentang sesuatu yang biasa bagi kita, orang Melayu dan agama kita, Islam, saya cuba sebaik mungkin menerangkan supaya mereka tidak memandang serong pada kita dan tidak tersalah mengerti. Alhamdulillah, setakat ini, kawan2 i kebanyakannya memberi i pelbagai pengalaman dan pengetahuan walaupun tak pernah bersua muka.

Dan dari kawan i juga la menimbulkan hobi baru...kumpul fridge magnet...ada sesiapa yang ada minat sama dengan i?

Nice rhyme

A friend of mine wrote this to me:

" mula2 bergurau, lama2 terpukau,
  mula2 berminat, lama2 tersemat.."

it was not specifically written for me but he shared this with all friends as well through our yahoogroup mail. It was surprisingly so apt in its meaning...

i mean here, we may find ourselves liking someone's way of saying things...that person may only try to make some jokes..having fun...with us, but we like the way he / she does it...so eventually, we may get spellbound by that personality...and so...we may really like that person...and will not be so surprising if that person becomes someone we really, really like and so remains in our heart. Touching our heart...probably unintentionally but touch us nonetheless.

Have you ever experience that? i have...

Don't easily judge others!

Hi semua...i found this from a friend and thought why not share with you. Do read and then think about it.

Sometimes people are quick
to judge others,
when what you see
isn't really all there.

People have different moods
different personalities
different desires,
so what you're really seeing
is only a mask,
of what others want you to see.

On the inside,
we all have the same desires,
a kind smile,
a warm heart,
a tender soul,
all wanting to be reached
on the inside.

We're all not perfect,
only human,
we'll have ups and downs
like a merry-go-round,
we'll make many mistakes.

But just remember,
the next time you see a person,
do not judge what’s on
the outside,
we could be having a bad day.

Try and see on the inside,
and you will see,
the kind smile,
the warm heart,
the tender soul,
reaching out....

Copyright © Sherri Emily Avery

In my opinion, we will be a much better person when we refrain ourselves from thinking bad of others. It certainly takes time to fall in love and be loved, as a friend told me once.

Have luvly weekend my friends!

Rindu itu indah..

Perasaan merindui bukan lah sesuatu yang aneh kepada sesiapapun. Rindu bukan sahaja kepada sesama manusia, rindu boleh sahaja kepada apa sahaja yang pernah kita alami sepanjang kita menjalani kehidupan. Dan i sedang merindu masa ini. Sangat2 merindu...

Dan bila rindu... aduhhh... jiwa rasa tak tenang...ingin sahaja rasanya kembali bersama melalui detik itu, saat itu, waktu itu, ketika itu... mengapa agaknya tidak dirakam saat indah seperti itu supaya i boleh mainkan berkali2 bila sahaja rindu ini melanda?

Apa yang pasti, saat indah, detik manis yang pernah i lalui itu, sentiasa bermain di fikiran i...menghibur i di kala diri merasa resah, di kala kehidupan kini seolah menghimpit diri...

Dan bila rindu... kenangan jua la yang i ada bagi menghilangkan rasa rindu ini...

Ish! jangan la fikir bukan2...

i rindu macam2 tau...rindu pada kehidupan masa i kecik...walaupun susah tapi i rasa seronok pula bila mengenang semula...tak mungkin akan dialami semula saat i memanjat pokok bacang depan rumah nenek, goyang2 dahan pokok sampai berjatuhan buah2 yang masak, atau ketika memanjat pokok limau kasturi dan duduk atas pokok sambil makan buah limau yang masam tu...atau masa ikut mak cari rebung, kena sengat oleh lebah, adoiii...atau waktu mengutip siput sedut di tebing sungai atau masa abang dan adik2 lelaki i buli i dengan kerja2 di rumah...membasuh pakaian, memasak...macam2 la..

sungguhpun kehidupan masa itu serba kekurangan...tapi...bila dewasa begini, i rasakan, kenangan masa kecil itu cukup indah dan i rindu suasana waktu itu...saat i baru belajar erti kehidupan yang mendewasakan i.

eh! dia yang i rindu...tahu ke dia???

Make up your mind to succeed

Okay, wanna share this knowledge i gained from reading Reader's Digest, May 2009. I found it interesting and worth sharing with you.

This is based on research done by a psychologist named Carol Dweck who studied for 40 years on how people handle failure.

She said:
At work, instead of letting salary, benefits and status define job satisfaction, we should ask ourselves if we are still learning while doing the job. If we answered 'YES' then we are fortunate because we have a job that encourages growth mind-set. Growth mind-set is a category whereby we believe that talent is not heaven-sent and effort and learning make everything possible. People with this mind-set finds failure as opportunity and not an insult. Because of this, we can reassess situation, adjust and try again.

Ermmm...experiential learning??

And i like this:
When feeling down, we always think that's just the way we are (which is what i usually think anyway). So the advice is instead of thinking ourselves as a failed end-product, we must view ourselves as having a temporarily derailed work in progress.

Hmmmm...interesting eh?

So my friends, the take away point is......KNOW WHAT U WANT....N WORK FOR IT!

I am an actress

Hidup ini penuh cabaran kan? Serba serbi mencabar...bila kita rasa seolah kita sudah terlepas dari cubaan...rupanya ada lagi yang datang...lepas satu, satu...

Kadang rasa seolah tak sanggup untuk meneruskan semua ini. Rasa letih mencuba, berusaha...

Apa kan daya..selagi kita hidup, kita tak harus berputus asa kan..

Bila orang kata dunia ini hanya sebuah pentas kehidupan...dan kita ini melakonkan watak kita masing2...memang betul la tu... setiap kita memainkan peranan kita sehingga Yang Maha Pencipta memberhentikan lakonan kita.

Jika ada yang berkata, dia tidak berlakon, itu watak sebenar dia...i kata dia bohong. Sebab bila kita menjadi diri kita sendiri, akan ada yang tidak suka pada kita. Sebab diri kita adalah diri yang 'careless' yang tidak ambil peduli orang lain. U tak percaya cakap i ni? U fikir2 kan la...bayangkan la bila kita ego...ramai ke suka dengan kita? Sikap ego kita tu la sikap sebenar kita kan?

Anyway, why did i say all this? Because i think, i am one of the best actress in this world...a talent no one has seen because i covered myself well...

Aku, Dia dan Kenangan

Kalau tak silap, ni tajuk lagu kot kan...hmmm..lagu sapa ek? lagu dulu2 ni...tapi mungkin i silap kot..cuma i rasa macam ada lagu ni..kumpulan Flybaits. Masa i kecik2 dulu, cukup hafal semua lagu2 Flybaits, Alleycats, Headwind...sekarang ni, lidah dah keras kot. Tak pernah ingat lirik.

I dapati ramai kawan2 sekolah i masih mengingati lagu2 ketika muda remaja. i ingat jugak. lagu dulu2 sedap didengar. lirik pun puitis. lagu2 sekarang ni dah banyak jenis sangat. macam manapun i tetap suka. i suka muzik. i suka dengar lagu. i suka lirik2 indah sesuatu lagu dan selalu tertanya2, maca mana idea buat lagu tu datang kepada pencipta ye? adakah melalui pengalaman hidup?

Apa2pun...entry i kali ni, mmg la sesuatu yang semua orang alami rasanya. Ada aje kenangan manis bersama ... sape2 la...boleh jadi kawan lama, pakwe lama, makwe lama, kekasih lama...sume la yg lama2 tu...

i ada jugak kenangan. banyak yg pahit dari manis. tapi i jadikan yg pahit tu manis sebahagiannya. sebab, yg pahit tu la yg menjadikan i spt diri i skrg. so tak boleh la pahit saja kan...kena la i jadikan ia manis.

kenangan akan sentiasa terbina selagi kita hidup. betul tak? dan macam i pernah kata dulu...kebanyakan kenangan tidak mudah dilupakan...

mudah2an 'dia' dalam hidup i suatu ketika itu...menjalani kehidupan lebih baik dan bahagia...

Arghhhhh...emosi!!!

Mengapa ada ketika ada jiwa yang tak tenteram?

I hate this part of me that sometimes go mushy mushy...making my brain like goes to the drain.

Where is the strong person i always have been all this time?

Where has she gone to?

Especially now when i need my faculty intact...mind, body and soul...

You know, i used to only talk to Him...asking His help...asking for His guidance and no others...

Being a woman is not easy my friends.

We are very much affected by our surrounding, hormones and emotions.

We say that we are strong but we work hard to proof that we are strong.

We are expected to be compliant, supliant...

...unlike man...their physical beings always indicate their strong nature. and their emotions are well masked. I guess, it is even harder for men...for they have to pretend strong even when deep in their heart, they are just like women...in need of emotional support...is it true man? 

Anyway...

Women are said to be superwoman when we are able to handle all...home, family, work, financial...but of coz we are! But then..i think this so called 'SUPERWOMAN' name calling is only given by women themselves...men don't see this quality in women do they? and can men do the same?

Pedas menyengat ni mak!

hehehe...

SALAM EIDUL ADHA...masih sempat lagi kan menerima ucapan itu? Mudah2an kawan2 i kat sini semua hepi bercuti dan menyambut hari raya...ada yang buat korban?

I beraya sakan juga...macam jugak raya Aidilfitri...makan kat rumah mak, then singgah rumah sis-in-law, then rumah uncle, pas tu rumah mother-in-law, n finally...singgah rumah cousin hubby kat Gombak! Sakan kan? So 10 Zulhijjah..perut i kenyang....then terima tetamu....kena la memasak pulak kannn...nyway, tetamu bawa rezeki kan. I mmg berbesar hati bila ada yang sudi dtg ke rumah. Penat la sikit tp berbaloi bila tetamu senyum kenyang...

Nak tau entry i cam tu? Pasallll...mak i masak semuanya serba pedas!

Cam biasa, rendang daging memang mak tak tinggal...kali ini, rendang mak...mak ai...terbakar mulut makan...lagi satu dish yang i and anak2 suka...sambal goreng jawa. Alahai..patut i snap picture kan? Sambal goreng jawa ni, campuran tahu, kentang, tahu kering, suun, tempe, kalau ada hati ke, pedal ke...leh je campur...goreng dengan hirisan cili padi, boh kicap, boh santan sikit...wallla! marvelous! Tapi kali ini..adeiii...lidah terbakar la mak!

Sehari sebelum g rumah mak, anak2 i bercakap dgn mak i...so mak i bagitau la,'kali ni nenek masak semua lebih pedas dari biasa..' So ingatkn main2...rupa2nya..sungguh bagai dikata...sampai adik i sendiri tak tahan la...berkali ke bilik termenung...hahahaha

I ingat nak share photos tapi...segan la pulak. Len kali je la ye...adios!

Cinta dan Benci

Mungkinkah kedua2 perasaan itu boleh wujud? 

Bagaimana ia boleh wujud sekali ye?

Cinta...satu perkataan yang sukar untuk diertikan...dan bila ia hadir...sukar untuk difahami hadirnya ia...membuat diri lemah dan kuat kerana hadirnya...

Benci...juga satu perkataan yang sukar untuk diertikan..perasaan marah, hampa, kecewa, bengang, dan seangkatannya...

Jadi mungkinnya...wujud cinta dulu baru benci atau benci dulu baru cinta?

Pernah dengar tak kata2 orang tua bahawa...bila kita membenci..janganlah sampai keterlaluan..takut benci akan bertukar rasa jadi sayang..kasih dan akhirnya cinta?

Jika begitu, mungkinkah sama caranya? Apabila terlalu mencintai..akhirnya membawa rasa benci?

Mungkin benci itu wujud dalam cinta apabila cinta itu dipermainkan...tiada keikhlasan menerima...

Jadinya: berpada2 dalam berperasaan??

Adeeiiiii...mood begini la plak...sebenar ingat entry kat blog Ella: Jiwa Kacau.

Dan bila dengar lagu dari Geisha..Cinta dan Benci...http://mp3bobej.blogspot.com tu yang terfikir nak tulis entry ni.

Apa2pun...ini adalah selingan fikiran...selamat berhujung minggu ye...

Keje oooooo...keje....

Adoi makkkkk....macam mana nak buat ni?
Lepas satu, satu datang....
Bukan..bukan...satu belum lepas, yang lain lak datang...macam mana ni?

Haaa...ini la yang bermain di kepala i sekarang ni. Tugas di pejabat tu...boleh tahan hebat. Iye la..kalau tak ada keje, tak ada la gaji kan...cuma i risau...mampu ke i buat sume ni? Bos dah kata...'tu KPI u Rozzana'...alahai...ada harapan evaluation rendah kalau KPI tak capai...lagi 2 bulan setengah je sebelum habis 2011 ni.

Tadi masa meeting, big boss kata...'u keje kat sini bukan part time tau..full time...so habis kelas kena punch out kat sini' . Gulp! i telan air liur yang memang sikit sbb kurang minum..hehehe...spontan je i jawab, 'it's difficult for me...i can't be clocking at shah alam when my teaching is somewhere else!' Nasib baik big boss tak marah dengar kata2 i tu sebaliknya dia faham...thank u Boss!!!

Tapi, pening lalat sekejap bila big boss kata, 'u shld only be teaching 10 hrs only and not more...u r an administrator now...' aduhhhh..teaching hours i lebih 10 jam seminggu...cam ne ek?

Hakikatnya, memang i tersepit giler ni..antara tugas pentadbir dan pengajar...yang satu beri pengalaman berharga, beri peluang berkenalan dengan orang2 kanan dan menambah ilmu dalam perkara lain...yang satu lagi juga beri pengalaman berharga, berkongsi ilmu dengan pelajar...menambah ilmu sedia ada juga...

On top of that, as an academician, we are expected to do research, write, supervise, publish etc...

And then, our salary, is not among the top earning in the service department.

Cikgu2 pulakkkk...lagi tinggi gaji dari i...tak payah nak buat research, tulis paper ke..., supervise student buat research ke...i nak jadik cikgu la...boleh ke? Alahaiii..kena buat Dip in Teaching la pulakkkk...

Hmmmm....

Balik ke rumah...letih..tidur lagi best!!!

Kenapa lelaki sukar ucapkan kata2 maaf?

Tu la yang i selalu fikir tau...

Sebab apa, i asyik tingat..masa raya, bila bersalam dan mohon maaf dan mohon halal semua la dari hubby, belum pernah i dengar hubby i balas dengan ucapan sama atau pun a simple words like ' abang punnn...'
Masa tu tak de la i cakap apa2..diam aje la...walau tak puas hati tu ada.

Pernah la i tanya selepas habis sambutan raya tu, 'kenapa abg tak pernah nak minta maaf dengan Ana, masa Hari Raya?' Hubby i jawab apa tau...aduhh...geram i dengar jawapan dia...'Sebab abang tak berdosa kat Ana..' Ada ke begitu? Betul ke dia tak de dosa kat i ye?

Cuba u tengok ni...betapa khusyuk i minta maaf kat dia:

Tapi kannn..sungguhpun begitu, bila i tengok mata hubby selepas i bersalam dan memohon maaf...mata dia bergenang air...sedih ke dia?

Apa2pun..i memang mengharapkan kemaafan hubby i setiap hari dari hujung rambut sampai hujung kaki..mudah2an dia selalu meredhai i...syukur...aminnn...

Kontrol ayu...huhu...

Haaaa...chakkk!!!
Nak ucap Hepi Diwali pun dah terlepas kannn...

Tapi...Hari Raya AidilAdha akan menjelma minggu hadapan...raya lagi!!

Hari ni i nak citer pasal i hadir konvokesyen kat tempat i keje...sekali i pergi sebab hari tu majlis konvokesyen untuk fakulti i, yang lagi 3 kali tu sebab bos suruh jadi pengganti dia.

Seronok tau menyaksikan students (dah ex- sekarang) naik ke pentas dan menerima watikah tamat belajar. I duduk di atas pentas, duduk depan sekali..barisan VVIP gitu..huhu...dapatlah tengok jelas wajah2 hepi students. Feel so proud of them and proud of myself too..sebab...i terlibat dengan kejayaan mereka ni secara tak langsung. Penat gak la bibir ni mengukir senyum semanis gula kat semua students yang lalu depan i. Alhamdulillah..mereka kenal i...

Pengalaman duduk di barisan hadapan kumpulan akademik dan barisan kanan universiti ni memang susah nak gambarkan. Kena control ayu sokmo...apa taknya..duduk baris depan...semua yang hadir kat dewan jamu mata tengok kita. Kamera dua bijik depan muka kita. Parents yang hadir semua boleh nampak kita. Kalau tak sengih sokmo...entah lah..kena nampak ayu u macam i kata tadi. Ala2 pengantin duduk i tau masa tu...sopan habis..kaki tutup rapat...memang cun abih la...(hehehehehe...kes perasan tak habis nih!).

Esok lusa ada giliran i g ke pentas lagi. Rasanya macam i tuang aje ... tak larat u... duduk tegak...kerusi lak walau cantik tapi tak cukup selesa...jadi pengantin duduk kat singgahsana tu paling lama sejam..ni 3 jam...aduhhh... So i jadik nakal sikit...i bersms ngan kawan..boring beb! Semalam i pergi, siap bawak material untuk baca...hehehehe...

Ni i nak share pic i...dengan jubah i sendiri...u mungkin tak percaya kan, selepas hampir 6 tahun i dapat ijazah ini, inilah kali pertama i amik gambar sensorang macam ni:

Ok tak i? 

Thank you....hehehehe...

My wishful thinking .... (ii)

As a wife, i have several wishes.

I wish to be a wife that:
- my husband will always feel proud of; be it in terms of my physical appearance, intelligence, social skills and as the queen of his house
- who is a best friend to her husband...selalu bersedia mendengar masalah atau kisah yang suami nak ceritakan...memberi pandangan apabila diminta...dan jika tidak pun...bersedia sebagai sounding board
- is a good cook...my weakness generally sebab i...tak pandai masak...cukup sekadar memasak yang biasa2 aje...
- pandai jaga nama suami...sentiasa menjaga airmuka dia...
- sentiasa senyum walaupun penat bekerja seharian..
- memberi kepuasan kepada suami dalam apa2 hal pun..
- yang solehah....yang diredhai suami sentiasa..
- tidak menyakiti hati suami..

banyak lagi..tak terfikir oleh akal pada masa ini.

Mampukah i??? sudah 20 tahun berkahwin...macam mana i nak tau ye kalau suami i berpuas hati ngan i...jika wishes i tu sudah tercapai?

My wishful thinking...(i)

Aduhhh...lama nye i hilang dari dunia blogging ni...lama ke? hmmm....


Ok. As promised, i nak tulis sikit pasal angan2 i...my wish...my wishful thinking...sebagai wanita?


I wish...that i am
- a beautiful woman, like Paulina Porizkova...cantik giler dia ni...aduhhh...masa i kecik2 dulu..pernah la berangan depan cermin kalau la muka i cam dia...
- a very rich woman...lots of money...xpayah nak keje...duit bergolek2 datang...hehehehe...this is really a wishful thinking...mana de cam ni kan? Tapi kalau  byk duit mmg best giler la...mcm2 i boleh buat...aduhhh..
- a woman desired by men...huhuhu...yang ini mmg xkan jadi punye...kalau dah wajah tak secantik Paulina mana mungkin kan? Sebab tu la i xsuka tengok cermin...malu!
- an adventurer...buat apa saja...pergi ke mana saja...tak takut...tak geli...mesti fun kan?
- an extremely intelligent woman...so that i can become the first Nobel Laureat receiver kat Malaysia...bukan sikit2 punya angan2 tu...
- a woman of many talents...wonderful kan? cakap apa saja..i boleh buat...


bila i fikir2...tak banyak rupanya wishes i sebagai wanita...

tapi my real wish is:

i wish that i am a woman loved by my man without prejudice...until the end of my life....

My wish...

This entry is going to be of several part. Will be divided into my wishes as a:

- woman

- wife

- friend

- mother

- teacher

there are many wishes...some wishes come true, some remain as wishes. 

I assume all of us have wishes in our lives...and so i will like to share mine. Soon...